Wisdom from Books

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Stephen Lau's website to help you get the wisdom to live as if everything is a miracle!

Friday, May 13, 2016

Mindful of Human Relationships

Happiness is an essential ingredient in the art of living well. Happiness comes from emotional, mental, and physical wellness, which are all interconnected because they align the body, the mind, and the soul to enable living as if everything is a miracle.

Good human relationships play a pivotal role in emotional, mental, and physical fitness of an individual. However, good human relationships are hard to come by. 

Any good relationship always begins with “self” first.
Here are some advice on maintaining good relationships:
(1) Be ready to be the first one to take the first step to enhance and maintain  good relationships. Have the wisdom of focusing on others rather than self. Deference to mindfulness of others first holds the key to maintaining good relationships.
Always be in mindfulness of others.
(2) Be grateful that you have the generosity of heart. You may be more blessed than others in that you have a greater capacity for mindfulness than others. Cicero, the great Roman orator, once said: “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues but also the mother of all the rest.”
Always be grateful for your blessed gift of mindulness of others in your healthy living.
(3) Be positive of others. The great Chinese philosopher, Mencius,once said: “The feeling of compassion is the beginning of benevolence; the feeling of shame and self-reproach, the beginning of righteousness; the feeling of courtesy and modesty, the beginning of propriety; the feeling of right and wrong, the beginning of wisdom. These four beginnings are like the four limbs of man and to deny oneself any of these potentialities is to cripple oneself.
Always embrace mindfulness of the four beginnings of Mencius in your healthy living.
(4) Be pleasant. Cultivate and develop a cheerful demeanor, a pleasant outlook — the attitude that every problem in life has a solution of some sort.
Always demonstrate mindfulness of positive outlook in your healthy living.
(5) Stop complaining. Keep all complaints to yourself—unless voicing your complaints will improve the situation.
Always resign in mindfulness of contentment in any trying situation.
(6) Try to see the good in others. Wherever possible, give them the benefit of the doubt.
Always be in mindfulness of others’ behavior.
(7) Be mindful of your behavior towards others. According to C.S. Lewis, you may need to “put on a friendly manner and behave as if you were a nicer person than you actually are.” In this way, you will be “really friendly than you were.
Always act in mindfulness towards others.
(8) Expect  less of others. Never expect others to reciprocate; if they do, let that be a pleasant surprise.
Always expect no mindfulness from others in your healthy living.

If you follow all the above, you will be a better and happier individual.

Mindfulness begins with awareness of what is happening to and around you, especially your actions, reactions, and interactions with others. Remember, you are living in a world of speed and compulsiveness, which focuses much on the self, instead of others.

Stephen Lau
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