Cancer Cure

 

This book is all about . . . .

This book is about what to do when one is diagnosed with cancer. The author is neither a doctor nor an oncologist. He is simply showing the power of the mind not only in coping with the traumatic experience of cancer but also in overcoming the disease itself. In addition, he presents detailed information on what an individual must do on the cancer journey of cure and recovery.

A cancer diagnosis is not a death sentence. Rather, it is an opportunity for growth and development. Harness your mind power to conquer your cancer.

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU'VE GOT CANCER!

An Excerpt from the Book . . . .

What is Cancer?

Cancer is a multidimensional disease. The word “cancer” is a term used for diseases in which abnormal cells divide without control and are able to invade other tissues. It is a consequence of the failure of your repairing and defense mechanisms in your body. Cancer cells can spread to other parts of the body through the blood and lymph systems. Cancer is one of the most dreaded diseases of humanity.

This is a common scenario. You feel a lump or a swelling under your arm and see your doctor about it; or you may have some health issues, requiring some tests. The doctor tells you that you have a tumor, which is a swollen collection of cells. Is the tumor benign or malignant? For confirmation, a biopsy is usually performed.

A benign tumor means it is slow growing, it does not easily spread to other parts of the body, and therefore unlikely to be fatal. If the tumor is malignant, it is growing rapidly, and is likely to spread to other parts of the body, and therefore life-threatening. If the cancer shows good response to whatever treatment the patient chooses, it is said to be in a remission. The chance of the cancer returning is often greatest in the first two years. In the next three years, the chance is considerably reduced. After five years, the patient is said to be cancer free. Probably as old as life itself, cancer has been around humanity for ages, but only in the second half of the 20th century did the number of cancer cases begin to explode exponentially. The sudden surge of this devastating disease was probably due to:

The drastic changes of high-stress lifestyle

The overuse and misuse of drugs and pharmaceuticals

The inferior quality and the huge quantity of junk food available

The excessive use of chemicals and extensive exposure to environmental pollutants

All of the above were not around a hundred years ago, or at least not as rampant as they are now,

Contrary to popular belief, cancer is not a mysterious disease against which you are powerless. If you understand its causes and take positive actions, and if your body still has enough time to make the necessary adjustments, you can still win your battle against cancer and become a cancer survivor.

Cancer appears to be a mysterious disease because it is a disease caused by not one but many factors. Unfortunately, the conventional approach to the disease is to treat the malignancy of the tumor. Cancer is holistic dysfunction of the body, the mind, and the spirit; as such, there should be a holistic approach to the disease.

Although you may not be a doctor or an oncologist, learn everything you need to know about your cancer. You need neither a medical background nor medical expertise to know the basics of cancer. Your goal is not just to survive your cancer, but to thrive and turn your health around.

You have to understand that in many ways you are responsible for the disease. Get a handle on why you may have made yourself prone to that disease in the first place. In life, everything happens with a reason, though it may not be too apparent to you at first. Once you understand the reason, you may be able to control, if not get rid of, the disease completely.

Be A Cancer Survivor

Although cancer is a complex disease, it is critical that you empower your mind to know as much as you can in order to initiate the healing process.It is estimated that only approximately 15 to 20 percent with chronic or catastrophic illness, such as cancer, can be called cancer survivors.

The attributes of a cancer survivor

A cancer survivor is an individual who is willing to take the responsibility for his or her health conditions, who makes an effort to reshape his or her life, and who actively participates in his or her recovery process.

Do you wish to become a cancer survivor, or are you content to become one of the 50 to 60 percent of cancer patients who just sit back and let their health professionals take control of their prognosis?

Even worst, are you like one of the 20 percent cancer patients, who have a death
wish because they have found themselves in a death trap?

If you become more knowledgeable of cancer, you make better health decisions, and you have a greater chance of survival.

Be a cancer survivor. The choice is all yours.

The Importance of Emotional Well-Being

An important aspect of your cancer therapy and recovery is your emotion, which
is controlled by your mind.

One of the most essential aspects of the mind is self-acceptance. As a matter of fact, self-rejection is the root cause of all emotional problems, such as mental depression. In life, you are who you are, and you must accept yourself as who you are, not someone you wish you were or could be. Likewise, you must accept the hard reality that you have cancer, and you must deal with your disease accordingly. Many cancer patients harbor thoughts of denial, or, worse, self-guilt. Therefore, if you are unhappy, angry, blaming yourself, the world, or even God, you are self-generating and perpetuating your own misery, which is destructive both emotionally and physically.

A Trauma, Not A Trap

To be diagnosed with cancer is already a traumatic experience, to have to undergo various therapies and treatments only further aggravates that excruciating experience. Therefore, it is critically important that you do not let your traumatic experience overwhelm you and turn it into an emotional trap.

What is an emotional trap? How does it differ from an emotional trauma?

Click here to get your copy.

Letting Go of Attachments

The Origin of Human Attachments

All attachments originate from the ego-self.

What is an ego? Do we all have an ego-self?

An ego is an identity of any individual. Yes, we all have an ego-self, with no exception.

As soon as a baby begins his or her perceptions through the five senses, that baby begins to develop an identity, such as “this toy is mine” and “I want this.” Well, there is nothing wrong with that initial identification. However, as time passes by, the human ego may continue to expand and inflate to the extent that it may become problematic with all its attachments.

What is the ego-self?

Simply look at yourself in front of a mirror. What do you see?

A self-reflection. Is it for real? Can you actually touch it? Not really; it is only a reflection of someone real—the real you in front of the mirror!

Now, do something totally different. Place a baby—if there is one immediately available—in front of the mirror. See what happens. The baby might crawl toward the baby in the mirror. Why? It is because the baby in front of the mirror might think that the baby in the mirror is another baby, and just not his or her own reflection.

Likewise, the ego-self may look real, but it is not real. To think otherwise is self-deception.

How is the ego-self formed?

Descartes, the great French philosopher, made his very famous statement: “I think, therefore I am.” Accordingly, you think and you then become what you think you are—the byproducts of all your thoughts and your own thinking.

Unfortunately, Descartes’ famous statement is only partially true: it is true that you identify yourself with all your thoughts projected into your thinking mind; but it is not true that your identities thus created by your thoughts and your own thinking truly reflect your true self. The fact of the matter is that you are not your thoughts, and your thoughts are not you. To think otherwise is a human flaw, which is no more than self-delusion or self-illusion. In other words, you are not what and who you think you really are.

Gradually, all your life experiences with their own respective messages—the pleasant as well as the unpleasant, the positive as well as the negative—are all stored at the back of your subconscious mind in the form of your assumptions, attitudes, causal concepts, and memories.

Accumulated over the years, millions and billions of such experiences and messages have become the raw materials with which you subconsciously weave the fabrics of your life, making you who and what you have now become—or so you think. In other words, they have now become your “realities” or your ego-self with its many attachments to make you believe you are what you think or wish you were.

Likewise, a baby originally does not have the ego-self (at least, not yet), and thus sees the reflected image in the mirror as another baby. But you, on the other hand, with your own ego-self, see the reflected image in the mirror as the same you, and not a different person. So, your ego-self is simply a reflection of you; what you see in the mirror is not real, just a reflection. But the problem is: you think it is the real you, and your false identity may lead to an identity crisis.

Learn how to let go of your attachments to the material world that define who you think you are, and these attachments may include your attachments to money and wealth, career and success, among others.

Stephen Lnd au

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Simplicity to Increase Mind Power

Living a simple lifestyle is the key to stress relief to preventing disease and  prolonging longevity. Simplicity is a way to increase your mind power.

In this day and age, living in this complex world of technology is not easy: The complexity of this world has taken a toll on the human mind, creating undue stress, as well as many emotional, mental, personal, and psychological attachments in the material world. For these reasons, profound human wisdom in living is essential to overcoming stress and letting go of all attachments. Simplicity is the first step towards detachment, which holds the key to unlocking the door to happiness. Live a simple lifestyle, deleting all the trimmings of life and living, as well as all the attachments that may have a negative impact on your mind.

Epicurus, the Greek philosopher, had this advice on how to lead a pleasant life: avoiding luxuries, and living simply. The explanation is that luxurious living may make you into a “needy” person whose happiness always depends on things that are impermanent and easily lost.

The late Robert Kennedy once said: “Sometimes I think that the only people in this country who worry more about money than the poor are the very wealthy. They worry about losing it, they worry about how it is invested, they worry about the effect it’s going to have. And as the zeroes increase, the dilemmas get bigger.” 

The bottom line: live a simple stress-free lifestyle to help you let go of all the trimmings of life.  A stress-free lifestyle goes a long way to helping your attaining longevity. 

A classic example is Ann Russell Miller, a celebrated socialite from San Francisco, also known as Sister Mary Joseph, She, who had ten children and nineteen grand-children, had grown up in luxury and privilege, and had been living a life of incredible wealth. Instead of shopping at Saks Fifth Avenue, and decorating herself with jewelry from Tiffany, she suddenly decided to give up everything, and became a nun devoted to living in poverty for the rest of her life. That unbelievable event happened more than two decades ago, and was then widely reported in the media across the country. Why did she make such a drastic and incredible change in her life? She said she had a calling, a true vocation that was hard to understand for the general public, even for the close members of her family.

"YOU JUST DON’T DIE!” 

This 154-page book is about how to live your life as if everything is a miracle if you just don’t die as you continue with you life journey with the many changes and challenges confronting you, including your loss of vision.

Human existence is meaningless without life purpose and human happiness. The pursuit of longevity has been going on since time immemorial. Consciousness holds the key to the success of this pursuit. Consciousness of living is wisdom of the mind to understand the self, others, as well as how and why certain things happen. Wisdom in living enables one to complete the rest of one's life journey and reaching the destination.

To live to 100 and beyond—if you just don’t die—you must ask questions about life; after all, living is about asking questions and seeking answers to the questions asked, and thereby instrumental in providing wisdom or a blueprint to continue the rest of your life journey.

The objective of this 154-page book is neither to convince you to crave longevity, nor to show you how to live to one hundred and beyond. It simply presents you with the consciousness of living the rest of your years—if you just don’t die!

Click here to get your copy.

THE TAO OF LIVING LONGER

Stephen Lau

Copyright © Stephen Lau

Why Prayers Are Not Answered?

Why Your Prayers Are Seldom Answered?

Albert Einstein once said, “Thinking is difficult; that’s why so few people do it.”

Thinking is a process of self-intuition through asking relevant questions to create self-awareness and self-reflection. It’s the natural habit of the human mind to try to solve all problems by asking questions. Through the process of solving problems, the human mind may then make things happen.

So, asking all relevant questions is self-empowerment of the human mind to increase wisdom because it initiates the intent to learn, to discover, and then to change for the better.

Here are some of the questions you may want to ask yourself concerning why your prayers are seldom answered or not answered at all:

What’s a prayer?

Jesus said: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7) Is a prayer just your way of asking for something that you want?

Is it a personal request to the Creator to make something happen or not to happen in your life?

Is it a conversation or communication with the Creator to further develop your relationship with Him?

Is it a way of seeking advice from the Creator to help you deal with your own life’s problems and challenges?

Is it a means of asking the Creator for His blessings you think you may be entitled to?

Or is it none of the above?

How often is a prayer said or offered?

Before you getting up, and before you going to bed?

Several times throughout the day, such as before your meals?

While attending a religious service?

Seldom, if ever, unless expressing with your condolences to someone you feel sorry for?

There’s an old proverb that says: “He who cannot ask cannot live.” Life is all about asking questions, and seeking answers from all the questions asked.

By answering all of the above questions, you may be able to self-intuit why your prayers are answered or not answered at all.

Your self-intuition requires not only your spiritual wisdom, but also your human wisdom, in particular, the TAO wisdom of the ancient sage Lao Tzu from China, who was the author of Tao Te Ching, the ancient classic on human wisdom.

Click here to get Why Prayers Are Seldom Answered.

Click here to get The Complete Tao Te Ching in Plain English.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© Stephen Lau

God and Your Marriage

 

ACCOUNTABILITY IN MARRIAGE TO GOD

Lack of accountability to God for what you’ve been doing to your marriage and your marriage partner is one of the reasons why divorce is rampant these days.

You’re living in a world in which injustice and vengeance are rampant. Living in the midst of this storm of unfairness may cause you unhappiness and even your own lack of faith in God.

But seeing the lack of accountability in others should, on the contrary, enhance your own accountability not only in your marriage but also in your everyday living. God is forever just and will bring judgment and justice to all—at His own timeline.

An illustration

In 1984, Archbishop Valerian Trifa was deported from the United States after being accused of being a Nazi supporter, who not only had incited attacks on Jews, but also was responsible for executing many Jews in World War II.

After World War II, the former Nazi supporter came to the United States as a refugee immigrant. He assumed the name of Valerian Trifa, and he was ordained as a priest of the Rumanian church soon after his arrival in the United States. He rose quickly to the rank of bishop and then archbishop, who lived in comfort in a 25-room farmhouse on a 200-acre estate maintained by his church.

Then, a dentist, who was a Nazi survivor, recognized the Archbishop as the Nazi supporter. The case against the Archbishop was reported in the media, and then pursued for more than a decade long by some survivors of the Nazi, Jewish organizations, journalists, as well as by the Justice Department of the United States. Their joint efforts helped focus public attention on those Nazi war criminals who were living in the United States.

At first, the Archbishop vehemently denied his former identity, despite some handwriting experts had confirmed that his handwriting was identical with that in some of the execution orders he had carried out while he was a Nazi supporter. As luck would have it, with the advancement of forensic science, some experts could incredibly still retrieve some DNA from those execution orders with the Archbishop’s own saliva on them. That was his undoing, and his final judgment.

In 1982, the Archbishop was ultimately ordered to leave the United States. But he had spent two years trying to find a country that would give him refuge. In 1984, Portugal admitted him, and he finally settled in Estoril, where he died at the age of 72 of a heart attack.

So, believe that God is merciful, but also a just God, who’ll judge injustice and any wrongdoing according to His own timeframe.

So, living in the presence of God is showing your accountability to every aspect of your married life. So, be faithful to your marriage partner to receive the blessings of God in your marriage.

Getting Married to Make You Happy?

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Why Changing Your Emotions and Feelings?

 

Help your marriage by changing your emotions and feelings as well as those of your marriage partner.

Emotions and feelings are two sides of the same coin. They’re closely related to each other, but they’re different in that emotions create biochemical reactions in the body, affecting the physical state, while feelings are more mental associations and reactions to emotions.

Harmony and Disharmony

According to the Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), we all have qi (氣), which is the internal life-giving energy circulating within each of us, giving us internal balance and harmony. Emotions are energy states, which may either contribute to or deplete our own internal life-giving energy, causing harmony or disharmony, and thus leading to positive or negative emotions and feelings.

Diseases and disorders

The truth of the matter is that any “excessive” emotion or feeling may become the underlying cause of many health issues.

Dr. Caroline B. Thomas, M.D., of John Hopkins School of Medicine, discovered that cancer patients often had a prior poor relationship with their parents, attesting to the pivotal role of emotions in the development of cancer.

In another study by Dr. Richard B. Shekelle of the University of Texas School of Medicine, it was found that depression patients were not only more cancer prone but also more likely to die of cancer than the other patients. If emotions play a pivotal role in cancer, by the same token, negative feelings may also adversely affect the symptoms or the prognosis of any human disease. Thoughts and feelings of anger, despair, discontent, frustration, guilt, or resentment are instrumental in depressing the physiological processes, including the human body’s immune response—a formula for promoting the development of an autoimmune disease.

So, an unhappy marriage may negatively affect your mental and physical health.

The seven emotions

According to the Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), there’re seven emotions which are the underlying causes of many internal diseases, and these emotions are: anger, anxiety, fear, fright, joy, sadness, and worry. Because Chinese medicine is all about internal balance and harmony, these seven emotions may even affect different human body organs. For example, excessive anger impairs the liver, causing headaches, while even excessive joy dysfunctions the heart, leading to mania and mental disorders.

Anger

Anger or rage is an ineffective and inefficient way to resolve any issue or to make any problem go away. Anger is a disruptive emotion that may often lead to depression, and worse, the breakup of a marriage or a love relationship, especially if the anger isn’t properly addressed and controlled.

So, how to change your disruptive emotion of anger or rage?

Take a deep diaphragm breath, and just feel your anger as you breathe in.

Look at your anger in your mind. Then review the situation, and ask yourself one simple question: Can your anger change the situation or anything?

Accept that you’re now angry, and then breathe it out. If necessary, use your arm like a sword cutting through your feelings of rage, while saying: “I can see my anger: it is as it was!”

Don’t hold your anger in; instead, let it go, by breathing it out. Don’t let it go as pain; instead, let it go as your acceptance. But your acceptance should be viewed not as a sign of your own weakness but as a statement of your own communication to yourself that getting angry will never solve the problem anyway or right away.

Then, remind yourself that anger is always present to serve a purpose to release some deeper issues, problems, and internal conflicts that you may be carrying in your own bag and baggage all these years. It’s always better to release anger than to turn it around to destroy yourself.

But suppressing your anger is also self-destructive, as the negative energy redirects itself back into your own body. Anger is always a path of destruction. Resolve anger by developing habits that may release internal conflicts in a constructive manner before it can be released as rage.

An illustration

Donna Alexander, the creator of the “Anger Room” in Chicago, first thought of the idea as a teenager living in Chicago. Having witnessed much domestic violence and many conflicts at school as a teenager, Donna Alexander finally decided to create a space where anyone can lash out without serious consequences. While at the “Anger Room,” the guests, after paying a fee, are given a safe space to unleash their anger and rage by smashing and destroying objects, such as glasses or even a TV. In addition, the room can also be set up to look like an office or a kitchen, where anger often becomes totally uncontrollable.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

“GETTING MARRIED TO MAKE YOU HAPPY?”

Click here to get your paperback copy; and here to get your digital copy.

Teaching Children About Sex

 

TEACHING CHILDREN ABOUT SEX

Sex is “a big deal,” especially in a marriage.

Surprisingly, some couples may have more sexual intimacy after several years of marriage. The explanation is that by then they may have much reduced level of stress: better financial environment; children growing up; less worry about conceiving a child. In short, sex can even get better as years go by in a good and healthy marriage.

However, some couples may also cease their sexual intimacy due to: childbirth; pursuing a career; midlife crisis; an out-of-marriage affair. That, unfortunately, is also the reality.

Living together without love or physical intimacy is “living separate lives”—it may also be due to pornography, which is addictive, pervasive, and destructive to the addicts and their respective relationships.

So, it‘s important for parents to educate their children about sex. But how?

Like building the foundation of a pyramid, teach them about the values of life and living, which are usually dignity, honor, and respect for self and others.

Growing up and getting married isn’t just about self or just two people: it’s about human relations—how you relate to others around you. For example, in a marriage it isn’t just about the relationship between you and your spouse; it also involves your children or stepchildren, the in-laws, and the friends. So, learn to develop good relationships, and teach your children to do likewise as they grow up. 

Relationships are related to emotions, both positive and negative ones. Teach your children to control and manage their emotions and temper tantrums, which will play a pivotal in their subsequent life choices and decisions.

All of the above will define and shape your children’s perceptions and understanding of the meaning and the importance of sexual intimacy when they grow up into adolescents and young adults.

The reality

Remember, just do your best, and let God do the rest. You can teach your children about sexual intimacy, but you just can’t control what they feel and experience in their lives. Controlling only generates resistance and distancing. This applies not only to your children, but also to your spouse. You can share with them what you believe in, but you just can’t make them believe what you believe in. That’s the reality.

Getting Married to Make You Happy?

Stephen Lau

Meditative Awareness

Meditative Awareness

There are many reasons for meditation: relaxation, clarity of mind, and spiritual connection, among others. No matter what the reasons may be, the main focus of meditation is on meditative awareness—mindfulness of what is happening at the present moment, such as breathing, bodily sensations, and mental thoughts. Without this acute meditative awareness or mindfulness, there is no relaxation of the body and the mind, or the spiritual connection to a Higher Being.

Meditation is finding the quiet or stillness between sounds and thoughts and experiences. It is this underlying quietness—so quiet that you can almost hear it—that forms a link between you and your sensations and thoughts. Meditation is all about re-focusing the mind on what is important and what is irrelevant or insignificant. In other words, through awareness, meditation prioritizes and changes perspectives regarding what is happening in life. Essentially, you begin to become aware of your adaptation to cope with the mundane world, such as dealing with attitudes and behaviors, as well as pain and stress. Through clarity of mind, you also begin to know yourself better, such as the reasons for your anger; you may even have spiritual enlightenment, such as perception of the purpose of your existence. In brief, meditation is a mental training of meditative awareness or mindfulness of breathing, physical sensations, and mental thoughts, and the perception of timelessness, focusing only on the present moment or what is “real” at that present moment.

Meditation has its practical application in everyday living for life. Meditation heals both the body and the mind if you can bring all attributes and benefits of meditation to your day-to-day world. 

By training your meditative awareness only to remain present in whatever activity you undertake in real life, you will find yourself right in the center of that activity you are engaging in. In this way, you will be doing your very best, and meanwhile getting the greatest satisfaction from doing so.

To illustrate, say, you are doing a mundane everyday chore, such as washing the dishes or taking out the trash; you may not like what you are doing, but you are doing it anyway just because you have to. If you have had training in meditation, you will know how to keep uninvited thoughts to a minimum while you are doing the dishes or taking out the trash, and thus enabling you to be in the center of what you are experiencing and to do it without distraction. A mind trained in meditation leads to a state of stillness that can be maintained no matter what you do, or what is happening around you. This is the power of meditation.

The principles of meditation can be applied to any non-meditating part of your everyday life, such as walking.

As you begin walking, let go of thoughts of the outside world.

Focus on your breathing: listen to the relaxed sound of your breathing in and breathing out.

Make your walk slow and purposeful.

As you walk, observe each step that you make. Notice all the physical sensations of your feet, as well as the way your arms swing back and forth, brushing against your body.

If uninvited thoughts come, re-focus your awareness on your breathing and physical sensations.

In this way, you can turn any everyday activity into meditative nature in order to enhance your awareness and clarity of mind, which can be life transforming.  Not only your senses come to life, but also you see how things change from moment to moment, so you have a better understanding of what is important and what is “real” in your life. Seeing things in perspective will help you let go of things you found most difficult to let go in the past.

Practice meditative awareness in your everyday activities in order to enhance your self-healing power of the body and the mind.

Stephen Lau

Copyright © by Stephen Lau

Why You Have Your "Freedom" Not to Choose "Fondling"

FONDLING

What is fondling? It is your desire to do repeatedly something that you are fond of to the extent that your mind just cannot stop your action. In other words, your fondling is your addiction and bondage.

DRINKING

Alcohol drinking is common among teenagers; about 40 percent of high school teens drink alcohol due to social acceptance of drinking and the belief that alcohol can lower anxiety.

Alcohol is an intoxicating ingredient produced by the fermentation of yeast, sugars, and starches found in drinks. Beer has 5 percent of alcohol; wine, made of grapes, has 12 percent of alcohol; liquor, such as gin, vodka, and whiskey, has about 40 percent of alcohol.

But alcohol has its many dangerous side effects. It slows down the brain functions, leading to slurred speech, lack of coordination between the body and the mind, unconsciousness, and temporary loss of memory. In addition to brain and nerve damage, there are many health issues of the heart and the liver related to alcohol drinking.

Social drinking may lead to binge drinking, which is drinking several times within 2 hours. Drinking only beer may progress to drinking wine or even liquor. The truth is that no amount of alcohol is safe or risk-free, and alcohol drinking is a progressive disorder that often leads to alcohol addiction and drug abuse over the long haul.

Freedom

As a teenager, you have the freedom to choose or not to choose social drinking as a platform for your interactions with others.

Not choosing it gives you the freedom to use other platforms for your communication with others, such as actively involved through traditional sports, afterschool clubs, and social excursions. Social media may or may not be an ideal alternative.

If you choose to start drinking beer, you must have the freedom to say “no” and not be pressured by others to start drinking wine or liquor.

Bondage

Alcohol addiction will put you in the bondage of alcohol withdrawal symptoms—anxious, confused, depressed, fatigued, and shaking while not drinking alcohol.

Another bondage of alcohol addiction is the shackle of drug abuse. Alcohol is very reactive with many drugs and medications in that it can magnify or negate the medicinal effects on an individual with alcohol addiction while taking those medications. So, drugs can be abusive and destructive to an alcohol addict.

The way to turn bondage into freedom is to stop consuming alcohol. It is never easy without medical and professional help. But you have the freedom to free yourself from that bondage.

 SMOKING

Smoking cigarette must be avoided because it contains nicotine, which damages the brain, leading to many health issues of the brain, the heart, and the liver later in life. Your brain, which continues to grow and develop up to around age 25, can be damaged by nicotine. The damage initially affects your learning with lack of attention and mood swings. Nicotine withdrawal—stopping smoking with symptoms of anxiety, depression, insomnia, irritability, and physical fatigue—often puts you back to smoking.

Nicotine is an addictive drug that initially gives you excitement to “free” you from boredom and anxiety. Many teenagers begin smoking cigarette out of curiosity, as well as having observed many celebrities smoking on screen in old movies or even their family members. 

Now, it is not even “cool” to do e-cigarette or vaping with its appealing flavors because they also contain nicotine

Freedom

You have the freedom of choice to smoke or not to smoke.

If you are already a smoker, you still have the freedom to quit smoking or continue to smoke.

But your freedom to smoke will inevitably put you in bondage.

Bondage

Your bondage to all the physical, emotional, and mental damages of smoking may be lifelong.

The only way to turn the bondage into freedom is to quit smoking. That requires physical, mental, and spiritual efforts and perseverance.

CALMING

In your transition phase, many addictions, other than drinking and smoking, may crop up as your mind continues to grow and expand.

Addictions are distractions from focusing on other more important things in life. These distractions can temporarily calm you down, but they do not solve your problems. Addictions to calming yourself can come in many different forms, including some of the following:

Eating: Foods give pleasures to the tongue. Over-indulgence in eating leads to obesity and other eating disorders.

Gambling: Winning satisfies the mental craving for success and self-confidence. Compulsive gambling is the source of many financial problems later in life.

Games: Video games can create “gaming disorder” with social anxiety, lack of motivation in life, and interpersonal conflicts in everyday life.

Networking: Internet obsession may lead you astray by directing to many platforms of misinformation and wrongdoings.

Freedom

You have the freedom to eat, to play video games, to go online, and to do just about anything in your daily life.

But you have only 24 hours a day, just like everybody else. So, you must learn how to manage your time and not giving yourself time stress. Good time management involves setting precedence and priority over anything and everything you need to do.

Living is about doing—doing what needs to be done, but not over-doing, which may, paradoxically, lead to non-doing.

In your transition phase from adolescent to young adult, your knowledge is essential to your doing. However, you must also understand the fact that knowledge is infinite, and your capability to acquire your knowledge is only limited. Your true wisdom is to apply your “limited” knowledge to see how it works in your everyday life and living—that is, knowing what to do and doing what you know.

So, spending too much time on anything is not the way to go.

Bondage

Not knowing that “excess leads to depletion” is your vulnerability to bondage.

To free yourself from being trapped to any bondage, remember the golden mean: “more for less” and “less for more.”

FREEDOM with BONDAGE shows you how to free yourself from your bondage to the flesh that gives you the "freedom" to make the wrong choices and decisions in your everyday life.

 Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Your Mind and Weight Loss

The art of living well is wisdom in living. Living well does not require abundance, but a healthy body, a sound mind, and a joyful spirit are the essentials of holistic living.

Everything in life begins with the mind--your thinking mind -- because it affects your decisions and life choices, precipitating in your actions and their respective consequences, which then become your life experiences. So, how well you live is contingent on how well you think. In other words, your thoughts create your personality and henceforth the raw materials, the building blocks with which you build your own life. Your thoughts become your realities in life.

But the mind is not independent of the body and the spirit; as a matter of fact, they are all interrelated, and hence the importance of holistic health in the art of living well. Accordingly, the mind is significantly affected by the body. A healthy body constitutes a healthy mind; what is good for the body is also good for the brain, the hardware of your thoughts. A healthy mind also breeds a joyful spirit.

Your body weight is often a good indicator of your physical health. As a matter of fact, your body shape may be a reflection of your current health conditions. To illustrate, if your body shape is like that of an apple, with extra weight in your midsection, you may have a higher risk for developing diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease, among other health problems. The explanation is that the abdominal fat stored in a beer belly is more likely to be converted into cholesterol, causing heart problems further down the road. On the other hand, if your body shape is like that of of a pear, with extra body weight around your hips instead of in your midsection, you may be less at risk for diabetes and stroke. Therefore, you cannot be healthy if you are obese. If you have heart problems with constricted blood vessels, your brain may also be affected due to restricted blood flow that carries oxygen and nutrients to your brain cells. To conclude, a healthy brain requires a healthy body with optimum body weight.

Holistic body weight management is a holistic approach to weight loss. Effective weight control is more than just about weight -- just as Oprah Winfrey once told People Magazine: "My greatest failure was in believing that the weight issue was just about weight." Oprah was right: weight loss is about the body, the mind, and the spirit, not just the body weight. That explains why many have failed in their fight against weight gain and obesity. To lose weight permanently, you need holistic body weight management, which begins with the mind, and not the body.

First and foremost, there must be the intent to lose weight. Some people simply have a couldn't-care-less attitude towards their health, not to mention their weight problems. The intent empowers the mind to find out everything about weight loss: the body's metabolism, the caloric intake, the digestive system, and the buildup of fat, among others. The road to weight loss is paved with hurdles and obstacles that have to be overcome with discipline from the mind. Weight control is mind over matter. But your thinking mind can be your asset or liability. To illustrate, you want a piece of cheesecake, but you strongly believe that it will make you fat. So you may have second thoughts about eating it. But, unfortunately, your mind has created what you do not want -- that is, getting fat--and you will attract what you do not want, which is gaining weight, through the Law of Attraction. Remember, your thoughts create your own reality -- sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. The human thoughts generate energy, and negative energy attracts negative energies. Likewise, obsessing with what you do not want will, ironically enough, get you what you do not want.

Once you have control over your mind, you can also have power over your body with reference to diet, exercise, and change of lifestyle that will facilitate weight loss. A healthy mind and body cherishes a joyful spirit that focuses on who you are, rather than who you want to become, and thus taking away the stress that comes with self-image in the process of weight loss.

Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau